They say old habits die hard. I think we can say old affections also die hard.
Just recently I had to deal with the old affections of my heart. I really thought I had forgotten them, killed them, buried them, never to see them again. But that was only a dream. A delusion of some sort. They didn't go away, they had only morphed into something else.
In case you're wondering, I'm talking about those fantasies, dreams of the type of man I always thought I'd end up with. I'm talking about the impressions old boyfriends and crushes have left on me. I think every daughter of Eve have them to some degree. I surely got my fair share of them. I fantasied and day-dreamt. I panted and crushed hard. I was border-line chasing these crushes if it came to it. As for the old flames, we were through but as with any experience we have in life, they inevitably left an impression on me. so what does a girl do with all these when she meets a great guy who wants to pursue marriage with her?
What I did was to just bury them alive. I just shoved them deep somewhere within my soul without asking God for help on what to do. The crazy thing is that these suckers know how to change appearance and come back to life so you won't even suspect. It starts out innocent but it's the little foxes I tell you! So instead of guarding my heart, I start to indulge in a little conversation here with a guy I had feelings for, or just a little imagination of what my life would have been without Mr. And that's how it starts. Until one day I'm on the verge of ruining a really good work that God is doing in my life.
Proverbs 14:1 teaches us that a wise woman builds her home but a foolish woman tears it down. I certainly was walking in the footsteps of the foolish woman by not watching what I dwell on. So what did I do? I asked God for help. What was the answer? Die to yourself. Check this verse out:
Just recently I had to deal with the old affections of my heart. I really thought I had forgotten them, killed them, buried them, never to see them again. But that was only a dream. A delusion of some sort. They didn't go away, they had only morphed into something else.
In case you're wondering, I'm talking about those fantasies, dreams of the type of man I always thought I'd end up with. I'm talking about the impressions old boyfriends and crushes have left on me. I think every daughter of Eve have them to some degree. I surely got my fair share of them. I fantasied and day-dreamt. I panted and crushed hard. I was border-line chasing these crushes if it came to it. As for the old flames, we were through but as with any experience we have in life, they inevitably left an impression on me. so what does a girl do with all these when she meets a great guy who wants to pursue marriage with her?
What I did was to just bury them alive. I just shoved them deep somewhere within my soul without asking God for help on what to do. The crazy thing is that these suckers know how to change appearance and come back to life so you won't even suspect. It starts out innocent but it's the little foxes I tell you! So instead of guarding my heart, I start to indulge in a little conversation here with a guy I had feelings for, or just a little imagination of what my life would have been without Mr. And that's how it starts. Until one day I'm on the verge of ruining a really good work that God is doing in my life.
Proverbs 14:1 teaches us that a wise woman builds her home but a foolish woman tears it down. I certainly was walking in the footsteps of the foolish woman by not watching what I dwell on. So what did I do? I asked God for help. What was the answer? Die to yourself. Check this verse out:
"I tell you the truth, unless a kernel of wheat is planted in the soil and dies, it remains alone. But its death will produce many new kernels—a plentiful harvest of new lives." John 12:24
So if I want a new life that will produce a plentiful harvest of new lives, I have to forget what is behind, die to myself and reach for what is ahead. What is your story?
Wow. I thank God you made a better choice, to die to self.
ReplyDeleteThanks for stopping by dear. I'm glad I did too. Nothing good comes easy.
ReplyDeletei like the ending scripture a lot, it makes so much sense. the future holds too much for us that its not worth it hold on to the past.
ReplyDeleteHi Femme Lounge, I'm glad the scripture spoke to you. Yes there's new mercies everyday we should learn to let go of the past.
ReplyDelete